Programmed

I think that I’ve been away from the writing post too long and been far too enamored with the myspace, facebook, twitter, aim and texting world.   I’m having a bit of writer’s block. I’m sure that I need to write but not what I need to write about or how I’m going to write. Dilemma? Yup.

Like never before I’m writing in internet speak, “lol” “lmao” “smh” or 🙂 are dominating all my correspondence and even attempting to sneak in my professional emails. “I have yet to receive my letter of recommendation from you and am in dire need of it as soon as possible…:-(.”  I wrote and was like whooooaaa, after its immediate deletion, I thought, “Wow…I am really losing my edge…”

I write papers the day before they are due instead of the week or 4 days in advance that I once did.  My last year of Undergraduate schooling saw me get some of the worst grades I’ve ever gotten. I lost my passion for writing.  I was pouring my energy into being the best activist, the best grunt worker, the best assistant and best tutor, I forgot about the heights that being the best writer can be.  This all started, initially with the idea to change the focus of my future career. Where once I had dreams of writing the Great American Novel or the next best comic book sensation or Saturday morning cartoon, I shifted to be a High School English teacher for the mere reason of getting my student loans forgiven and because I’m a good bible study teacher.

After a talk wit my good friend Casey Campbell, he told me in very few words, “You’ll never be truly happy in a job or career unless ur doing something you love and why not make money and be happy following your dreams? The money you make from a fulfilling high paying job of your dreams will pay off your student loans just like this teaching will do. But at least you’ll be happy while you’re working.”

I felt so foolish because I never thought of it that way. I’d spent 3 years trying to be a teacher but never thought…hey why don’t I become a writer? Why not? I can even do both.  So this is my effort to de-program my brain from the one track thoughts of being a teacher or just working with student orgs on campus, I think I’m better suiting doing what I’ve done best my whole life and that is to write.

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